Atlas Shrugged - aka the weight of the world

In "the good ol' days" people were likely to lose a lot of weight during chemotherapy because of the nausea that is involved. However, modern medicine has cured that problem and now, thanks to anti-nausea medicine and lack of energy, some people can even look forward to gaining weight. Can you say "that's just not fair!?"

Most people who know me well have heard me fret about my weight at one point or another. Shockingly, I wasn't svelte when I was younger. In fact, some kindly referred to it as "babyfat" and others unkindly referred to it as "thunder-thighs". I inherited my father's weak spot for ice cream, chocolate and I are on a first name basis, and coffee really is better when it has a big fat dollop of real cream and sugar.

This new adventure over the past three months is just a roller-coaster of a ride on the scale. Lose 13 lbs. Promptly gain it it back. Rinse. Repeat. Overall the downward trend leaves me optimistic that I will be able to fit back into my jeans that I had before I got married and "b.c." (before children). And my friend said, the only thing worse than having cancer is having cancer and a fat ass.


Well woman exam: $40 copay
Biopsy: $40 copay
Hysterectomy: $100 copay
Chemotherapy: $600 copay
Radiation: $40 copay
Wigs: $250 copay
Being skinny: Priceless
For everything else there's insurance!

follow the yellow brick road (and blog postings via email)

The familiar "duh ding duh ding" of skype called me out of a benadryl induced coma. My mom was calling me. Of course I had to answer as it was sure to be important. I guessed right, she wanted to know how to sign up and follow my blog - but not just to "follow it" she wanted email delivered to her inbox. I hadn't given it much though even though I love that I have a bunch of followers. I had tinkered with things a bit last week to try and see if it would email, but hadn't gone so far as to try and figure anything out. So tonight with a bit of time on my hands and some additional prodding from Alyssa I think I've figured out how you can sign up to get email. It's a test feature at this point, but presumably it will work for those who want to get a little email in their inbox as I post changes. I am testing it tonight with my own yahoo account and we'll see what happens. Cross your fingers for good computer luck tonight.

#2 is upon us, er, me...

I am sitting in the hospital. No, I don't want you to feel sorry for me 'cause right now I'm laughing. In my day job I deal with processes and preventing risk all the time. So here I am, sitting in the hospital and am just laughing at how screwy their risk management processes are. Every time I come in they ask certain questions such as whether or not I wear glasses or contacts (I don't), whether I have allergies (none related to medical stuff), and my address and insurance information (which hasn't changed in many many years). They caution me to not get up and walk the 3 feet to the bathroom if I'm dizzy without help so that I won't fall (and presumably sue them?) So, isn't it surprising that for cycle #1 when I checked in to the hospital they didn't have any idea why I was there? They had record of me checking in, but just had no idea what to do with me. And this time the orders were "submitted" but not "electronically signed", so they couldn't be processed. And to top it off my nurse just came in and asked me what kind of treatment I was supposed to be getting. Her: "You got the the 24 hours of taxol last time, not the three hour dose, right?" Me: "Yeah, uhm, why?" Her: "That's what I thought. But don't worry, I'll fix it." Me, too shocked to say the obvious: "WHAT????" My nurse is great. She's the one that's paying attention here and triple checking things to make sure they're right. I guess she's the last preventive control before stuff gets dripped into my veins, so I'd better trust her.

What? Cycle 2 is next week?

I have been feeling so energetic the past two weeks. Today's energy was spurred by a 3 mile run and a cup of coffffffeeeeee. I feel so good that I am actually anxiously awaiting my next chemo cycle. That may seem obsessive, but I'm very goal oriented. Ya know: "1 down, 5 to go... Let's get this show on the road so I can get back to my real life." So no, I am not worried that it's going to be worse than the last round because that would "not be fun". With the last cycle (April 19th) I was in the hospital at 9 am Monday through Wednesday 10 am. The rest of the week I sat around on the couch and played video games. Being a bump on a log is not something I do often or well - I know it's shocking to have found my weak point. I'm not saying that I am looking forward to how it will make me feel, as it was overall a somewhat crappy experience. I didn't have any energy, I am still way slower and much worn out than before, and I have occasional tingling in my hands and feet, and I felt vaguely nauseated for a week. Sort of your run-of-the-mill symptoms I suppose. Nonetheless next Monday will be another important milestone in the process and even though I'll be tethered to bags of poison, it feels a bit more "active".

For those who want to know, I am scheduled for hospital check-in at 9 am every three weeks on a Monday. Since the hospital provides free internet you'll also be able to email and/or skype (shellssc) me!

4/19 - check, done, complete, conquered, achieved, mastered
5/10
5/31
6/21
7/12
8/2 (last treatment of chemo!!!)
Radiation would likely start somewhere around 8/23 and be daily for 5-6 wks (haven't met the radiologist doctor yet)