and then they call...

So the phone finally rang. Yeah the doctor's office kept me waiting all day. The nurse had to go track down some of my lab tests. She called me to tell me what the results were before the doctor has even seen them. So I have no medical interpretation of the results... I think I would have preferred her to tell me that she didn't have any news rather than tell me 1/2 an answer. And that's cause the answer's not the one I was hoping for. Sure my Thyroid and metabolic rate is in the normal range and my CBC (complete blood count) is mostly normal. My Hematocrit is a tiny bit low (35.9 when normal is above 36).

Let me preface the news with the statement that things really haven't changed since my last test in November. I had an abnormal is PAP with atypical cells of undetermined significance. In November the results also showed that I was HPV negative. At the time my doctor reassured me that abnormal cells are extremely common post-radiation and that he was not concerned. So this round of tests showed that the pesky abnormal cells are still there, but now I'm HPV positive. That brings two questions to mind: 1. is the change from HPV negative to positive of medical significance? and 2. is it likely that the cells would still exhibit "normal abnormal" characteristics 4 months after radiation? And by that I mean shouldn't they be "normal normal" by now??? Alas I have to wait until WEDNESDAY until the doctor can review my results and comment on them. He's in surgery on Tuesdays, you know, saving lives and all...

Not to worry though, I already spent 5 whole minutes doing internet searches to convince myself that "no, the results are not something to freak out about". But if you don't mind, I might just sit here and obsess for the next two days anyway.

five down 20-23 to go...

Radiation started this past week. I have now endured 5 sets of being bombarded by particles that both cure and cause cancer. Monday the ordeal kicked off about 1/2 hour late. I have one of the earlier timeslots in the morning and these appointments are supposed to run much more like a swiss clock than normal doctor's visits, which I would liken to swiss cheese. So this did not leave me with the confidence that things would always be on time and on schedule. Fortunatey Tuesday - Thursday was pretty much on time, but Friday was almost an hour late. Given that the actual radiation treatment takes about 1/2 hour the overall average time commitment is close to 2 hours once you factor in the commute and changing into approrpiate garb. Also, on a weekly basis I am expexted to meet with the radiation oncologist to make sure treatment is going well. So far things are going okay and I have minimal debilitating side effects. However, given that I have about 10 hours a week dedicated to those doctor's appointments and I'm working full-time I've still been trying to figure out how to fit all things together. Add on top of that the other personal obligations such as Katarina's first day of kindergarten (which is probably worthy of a whole post in and of itself).

The radiation is interesting enough. I get placed on a machine and they move me around until my tattoos and markings are lined up in the lazer sights. Then they cover me with a flimsy blanket to keep me warm and leave the room. I should be able to pick my music, but usually they have a classical CD playing. Thursday I got a trip down memory land starting with Dreamweaver and then Blinded by the Light - how fitting, eh? Then I start counting. The big machine zaps me from 9 different angles. I even started counting the number of total zaps to keep my mind off how cold I am or how uncomfortable it is to lie flat on my back on a metal plate (221 I think). I don't get the same number of beams from every angle, so it's kind of fun to know how far I've gone and how many are left: 27, move, 50, move, 72, 96, etc. It may not seem like much, but it helps to pass the time.

Like I mentioned, I have not felt too many side effects. Fatigue is a big one. Mere mortals probably would be wiped out, but I'm still powering through. The other main side effects are nausea and general digestive junk. To combat the nausea I have been eating more, which sadly is no help to my struggle to not gain any more weight. My doctor told me not to worry about it, but he's not the ones who can't fit into his cute gray pinstriped pantsuit.